Somewhere within the outskirts of Little Brazil and in the midst of the daily cluster*uck of a traffic jam that seems to always reside there, lies a restaurant that first started out in San Diego before making its expansion to Central Florida. Notorious for having a very diverse menu full of massive plates of food with sinister combinations, Hash House a Go-Go is no joke and is not for the faint of heart. Already a Travel Channel hit with the Las Vegas installment making it to television, this place was not only recommended to me, but also was included with a dare---as the individual told me there’s no way I can finish any of the meals on their menu.
Bring it.
Open since the early 2000s, the Little Brazil version of this hybrid of quantity and farm quality clearly has a good reputation as it had a nice crowd when I went inside. More interesting was the lack of obvious tourists, which means the locals sneak through the arsenal of tourist traps to make their way here. The menu is no joke as there are intimidating items left and right. Also helping the intimidation factor are the servers walking around with the massive plates full of sin.
They even have a burger with bacon and mashed potatoes smacked in the middle. I am afraid.
I decided to go with the lunch version of the Man vs. Food (In honor of the show that I wish still existed, with a format that involved more hosts) favorite, the farm benedict that featured the following: Andy's sage fried chicken w/ fresh spinach, hardwood smoked bacon, market tomato, griddled mozzarella, chipotle cream and mashed potatoes. I also threw in a helping of their iced mocha for good measure.
Everything about this place is big: the prices, the portions, the plates, the meals, and even the restaurant itself. Very spacious, making it easier to navigate through while waiting for the food. Their iced mocha monstrosity is a jolt of coffee with plenty of whipped cream and caramel to go around. While I am forever a WaWas brat in terms of my iced/frozen coffee, the one here definitely delivers. That being said, that $7 price tag stings.
The meal however: Jesus.
Oh Jesus.
My goodness............
One of the scarier plates of food I have ever encountered, any dish that requires a steak knife to hold together is bound to give you a rough time. The best way to review this is to go layer by layer.
The bottom layer of mashed potatoes with bacon was very good, had the right crunch and smooth texture to work with the biscuits which were lying on top. These biscuits were quite hearty and easily can dethrone you before you can even get to the top layers. After that we encounter the spinach, which was practically pointless, even if it cooled down the heat steaming from the chipotle sauce that hugs the meal like a Snorlax on a bed. I am handing myself 100 points for the Pokemon reference.
The chicken on top however, was something interesting. Texture-wise, it was rougher and tougher than American-made skirt steaks. It had a heavy crunch that cleans the sinuses and challenges your jawbones. But you fight through it because the chicken is juicy, flavorful, and makes up for almost missing a few teeth in the process. Helping it is the mozzarella cheese melted on top, which was also supporting the heavy cream-based chipotle sauce that sticks to the sides of your stomach and doesn’t let go. I assure you, after this meal, you won’t consider food for the next 24 hours.
I gave the meal a good fight, but it ultimately defeated me. Those biscuits were too much. Overall you can’t really gripe on the price because you have enough food for two days practically. It’s not exactly Applebees prices, but the quantity more than makes up for it. Almost everything here is shareable in case you want to cut back on spending---or don’t want to look like a glutton in front of people.
Bottom Line: If you are looking for something unearthly, something far out the portion spectrum, then this is your place. Dieters, vegetarians, and those with weak hearts beware: Hash House a Go Go is going after your soul. It’s going after everything you’ve got, as it throws some sinister combinations at you that all sound and look delicious. This is one of the better group-setting restaurants because of its sheer scope. This place is fun, its good, just be prepared to eat----a lot.
Final Verdict: Recommend. With a totally empty stomach.
Hash House a Go Go
5350 International Dr
Orlando, FL 32819
